What's My Motivation? Designing Goal Setting Experiments for a Fulfilling Life
by Laura Young
I read Buckminster Fuller's Universe by Lloyd Steven Sieden at the recommendation of a client and was so struck by a passage in the preface that I wanted to share it with you.
"Fuller became so adamant about the contribution he could make that in 1927 he actually created an experiment using himself as "Guinea Pig B" (for "Bucky"). The specific purpose of this experiment was to determine and document what one individual could accomplish on behalf of all humanity which could not be achieved by any organization, government or business, regardless of its size or power. That experiment remained a critical element of Fuller's daily life until his death fifty-six years later."
Can you see the depth of the love and service in that experiment? What greater love is there than to say, I am going to dedicate my life to the experiment of seeing how much goodness, love, creativity and beauty I can bring to the world in my lifetime?
So many of our goals have to do with our external life. We want more money, more time, more energy, more happiness, a better job and to get our bodies in shape. Often these goals have to do with a sense of lack or dissatisfaction. We want more of something, like money or status, or less of something, like cellulite, or clutter.
So, Bucky has me thinking now. What if we shifted our focus to who we want to be rather than what we want to have or get rid of? What if we focused on what we wanted to give and contribute rather than what we want to receive? What would happen in your life if your single resolution was to experiment with how much love, goodness, beauty and creativity you could bring to the world or at least your particular corner of it?
Notice the word experiment.
You don't have to know exactly what this is going to look like. Allow yourself to be more curious than certain and let your single resolution simply be the guiding principle by which you assess your actions.
Think about it. If one wants to bring more love to the World, that includes everything. Bucky used the term "Universe" without "the" in front of it. He chose to do this because using "the" separates Universe from Us. Universe isn't separate, it is everything, all inclusive and we are fully integrated with it and influenced by it whether we are aware of this or not. Think in terms of eco-systems. Eco-systems have always existed, even though our awareness of such integration is a relatively new development. Viewing ourselves as separate from Universe, Nature, and others is dangerous the the health of the system we are a part of.
By way of practical example, if I want to bring more love to the World, and I really stay present to that thought, I am far less likely to eat things that are bad for me. Filling myself with unhealthy food is not an expression of love for myself. Serving unhealthy food to others is similarly inconsistent with my overarching desire for my life to bring more love to the world.
And there are ripples from shifts like this.
There is a Community Supported Farm not far from me. The weekly dinners we would have with friends when our vegetables would arrive were the medium for cementing a friendship that is a strong as ever even though these friends live half a country away now. A decision to eat organic food led to community and friendship, not to mention the benefit to the farm and the good works that they extend themselves in to.
Thinking about being more loving and aware is a lot more appealing and motivating to me than "I have to lose ten pounds".
When you are guided by your values, self-abusive habits like spending money you don't have, failing to take your body out for some fresh air and exercise, and participating in gossip start to fall away because they aren't consistent with who you want to be.
This does not mean that you have to become self-righteous. You have to live in the world and it is best not to annoy people with your new found wisdom and insight. This is why I love the idea of this being an experiment. You can approach this gently. All you are doing is just keeping the question alive here. How can I be more loving in this situation? How can I be more creative here? How can I bring more peace to this situation?
What starts to happen ultimately is that fear has less and less room to grow. If I say "I want to make a million dollars this year" I add a level of stress that colors everything I do. I start to view what I do in terms of money, my clients in terms of money, my time in terms of the money it will or will not bring me, other coaches as a threat to my piece of the pie. In short, I start to compete.
If, however, I say I want to bring more love, goodness and creativity to the world, that is going to guide my interactions with everyone I am in contact with, including my virtual network of readers. If I respect myself and the values which guide my actions, I will treat myself better and there will be more of me to give as a result. Not surprisingly, my world, including but not limited to, my business will thrive.
If I say, "I want to lose fifteen pounds" I will start to fear food. I will deprive myself, feel constricted, get discouraged, and get stressed when the holiday goodies surround me. If I come from a perspective of making loving choices for myself, it will be a lot easier to engage in moderation. I'll allow myself treats without being upset that I have "blown my diet".
A lifestyle guided by loving, healthy choices will get you where you want to go.
So, I invite you to join me. Design your own experiment. Set aside your goals and reflect on the values you hold most dear. Let those values guide the actions of your day at work, at home, in your private times. Consider what could be accomplished on the part of humanity if we each committed to living a life based on love rather than fear.
Need help moving from insight to integration and implementation of these concepts? Laura Young, M.A. is a life and business coach and owner of href="http://www.wellspringcoaching.com">Wellspring Coaching.
Laura specializes in working with individuals negotiating midlife transitions (personal and career), self-employed individuals on business development strategies and high level leaders on communication and leadership skills.
With over 25 years of experience working in personal development, Laura has written extensively on such topics as stress management, motivation, finding one's life purpose, achieving life balance, cultivating a healthy lifestyle and improving communication in personal and professional relationships. Please visit her href="http://www.wellspringcoaching.com/blogs.htm">blogs and website to tap in to her extensive resource base.
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